Recently I found out I have Carpal Tunnel Syndrome (CTS). As is the case for many, I had no clue I had it until my hand and arm started going to sleep at night, with pain shooting up to as far as my shoulder. Doc sent me to a neurologist who did a nerve study and told me on a scale of 1 to 10, my CTS was already an 8. Damn. Good news is surgery, although forthcoming, is avoidable for now. The night pains have been halted by wearing a splint while I sleep, and that along with some modifying of how I use my arm, are keeping it at bay. The knife won’t have to come out of its sterile box until the CTS starts interfering with work and daily living.
Nerve is today’s Daily Prompt. My first reaction when I saw it was the phrase “you’ve got a lot of nerve.” That got me thinking – do I have a lot of nerve? (in a good way that is) Well, some I guess. I’ve shaved my head bald for a fundraiser for cancer. I faced up to my drinking problem and got sober. I’ve quit a job, without another one in sight even, to stay true to myself and my values. Okay, a few points on the scorecard of life. But what about the rest of my scorecard?
Carpal tunnel syndrome is numbness, tingling, weakness, and pain in the hand caused by pressure on the median nerve in the wrist. What does this have to do with my scorecard of life? Lots. I think I may have some carpal tunnel syndrome of my soul too.
You see, as much as I can be brave, courageous, strong, yada yada, there’s a very wimpy side of me too. And I now realize Wimpy is getting in my way of being able to really live the life I dream of. Perhaps I should have been the author of the Diary Of A Wimpy Kid series. Gee, all that money would have allowed for some of my dreams to come true. Well, the material ones at least, but that’s not what I’m really concerned about. As my mama used to always tell me, you can’t take your stuff or your bank account with you when you go dear.
What I’m concerned about is a kind of soul sickness that I suspect I may have fallen ill to. A numbness of my soul caused by ignoring my true feelings. A tingling that appears every time I let worry creep into my life. A weakness I experience every time I fear failure, what others think of me, or that I’m not good enough. A pain I feel when I think about my less than perfect moments of my past. And all of this is caused by pressure on the median nerve of my entire existence, my soul. And the pressure is, in one word, me.
So to translate over some of the things my doctor told me to do regarding the CTS in my wrist, here is what I would like to make for my treatment of the Carpal Tunnel Syndrome of my soul:
- Periods of rest but also shake it up every now and then, especially after repeated repetitive movement.
Rest through prayer and meditation, keeping in mind the 11th step prayer. Shake things up a little in my life by trying new things, stepping out of my comfort zone, and continuing to sing Sweet Caroline by Neil Diamond loud and without inhibition wherever I am when it starts to play.
- Stop activities causing the numbness, weakness, and pain.
Take and live life one day at a time, staying in the gift of life – the present. Listen to my gut = God’s Undeniable Truth. Tell Wimpy to get lost and go write another diary.
- Do exercises and stretching to increase flexibility and strength.
Be kind. Be generous. Be loving, unconditionally. Be grateful. Be a dreamer. Be a writer. Be fun. Be a leader. Be the girl who does the happy dance in the middle of the mall just because she knows it makes her kids laugh and smile. And most importantly, just be me.
Think you might have a touch of CTS of the soul yourself? Well I sure as heck aren’t a doctor, although I was in pre-med at university for a bit, guess I had some nerve back then too when I decided to change majors after realizing I didn’t want to be a doctor. Anyway, if you have diagnosed yourself with CTS of the soul too, here are some of my favourite TED Talks that might be good for your own treatment plan. Or failing that, maybe you’ll at least enjoy listening to John Legend sing. That’s good for the soul regardless I think.
Steve Jobs – How To Live Before You Die
David Brooks – Should You Live For Your Résumé … Or Your Eulogy?
Tim Urban – Inside The Mind Of A Master Procrastinator
Shonda Rhimes – My Year Of Saying Yes To Everything
Tim Ferriss – Smash Fear, Learn Anything
TED Talks Education Host John Legend singing True Colors
Image source: The Quotepedia
Wishes and hugs from Cyprus!
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Right back at you from Canada! 🙂 Marianne
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Congratulations on shaving your hand and sobering up!
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Thanks very much Greta. I am grateful for both days that I found the nerve to one, do something I really wanted to do (raise money for cancer), and two, do something I really needed to do (get sober).
Hope you’re having a kindness-filled kinda day … Marianne
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Yes I am, thank you 🙂
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<3<3<3What a great post! Very inspiring! 🙂 These- 'Be kind. Be generous. Be loving, unconditionally. Be grateful. Be a dreamer. Be a writer. Be fun. Be a leader. Be the girl who does the happy dance in the middle of the mall just because she knows it makes her kids laugh and smile. And most importantly, just be me.' These should be my daily mantras!
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Thank you kindly. So happy to know you found it inspiring! I think I need to make those statements my daily mantras now that I’ve written them out. Might have to go back and print that post and tape put it on my nightstand so I see it every night and morning.
Thank you again, both for the visit and the lovely comment. Hope you’re having a kindness-filled kinda day … Marianne
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🙂 It is a good day.
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Hello.
Mmm. We wear out. Repetitive manual work can ruin the carpal tunnel. Things take energy. Have you used your soul for the right things, or spent it on tawdry flim-flam? You raise huge questions here. Yes to “Be kind”.
I wrote “But why “Wear a hat”?” then ctrl-F’d for hat, and found that you bought one, in August last year. Doubly Yes to “Be kind”. And “Ask what God requires of you, which may not be too much busyness”.
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I have used my soul for both right things and for tawdry flim-flam, I must admit. It’s the tawdry things that are bugging me right now, that’s what feeds the soul sickness I think. But the right things remind me I’m not as messed up as my inner Wimpy would like to tell me.
Guess God isn’t done with me yet, as I appear to very much still be one of His works in progress. As long as there is progress, I’m cool with that.
Thanks for the visit Clare and the note. Made me sit back to ponder your question and I liked that.
Hope you’re having a kindness-filled kinda day … Marianne
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Very good read, I enjoyed! What is pushing you? What is making you see the light? What motivates you to stay strong and move forward? Thank you for sharing! 🙂
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Thanks very much Brett, appreciate the kind words.
I could write a whole post just to answer your questions! It’s a lot of things I guess, mostly good ones. My motivation comes from all sorts of places, that could be another post too.
Sorry to be brief but I really can’t think of a way to simply answer your question.
Thanks for the visit and the note. Your questions are very thought-provoking and just the kinds of thoughts I need to be provoked to have. Hope you’re having a kindness-filled kinda day … Marianne
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Very interesting analogy and probably vey true.
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For me it sure is. True that is, we’ll have to see about the interesting 😛
Nice to see your name in my notifications tab again Bernadette … Marianne
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Love the metaphor! And great courage comes from honest introspection I think. I would say your wimpy self may actually be a catalyst to your bravest self, that’s why you are having such a reaction to it. Thanks for sharing! So glad you are able to keep the knife at bay for a bit longer as well!
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Thanks very much for the visit, the note, and the happy non-surgery thoughts.
So Wimpy might be a catalyst eh? I like that thought, will have to ponder it some more. Might just be part of my strong reaction … hmm …
Thanks again, hope you’re having a kindness-filled kinda day … Marianne
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Insightful, creative post. Though I don’t exactly share in the feeling of numbess, your words spoke to me in another way. Lately, I’ve been struggling with feelings of brokeness–that I’m defective or “not right.” I think mine might be, in part, a soul problem too.
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Sarah, you are not defective. But you might be perfuctly fecked up like me lol. Check out my trilogy of posts about it, you might relate to one of them. Here’s #3 with links in it to #1 and #2. 🙂 Marianne
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You are very brave Marianne.
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Thanks Ranu, I try to be every now and then, when Wimpy isn’t wanting to play that is haha. Marianne
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But you do take your soul when you go, isn’t that exciting? The intangible thing your eyes are a window to. Medial, lateral, etc. 😉
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Yes we absolutely do. And my mom had a theory I adopted … when we pass, we go through all of the feelings of the experiences of our lives, ie. how we treated ourselves and others. Sure hope my positive ones are greater than the negative ones! Marianne
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That sounds oddly familiar…and I think I agree! You’d want a happy movie, not a complicated one for your life review. On that note, you may enjoy the movie, Defending Your Life, if you haven’t already seen it. 😉
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No I hadn’t seen it or even heard of it. Just IMDB’ed it though and looks like something I would enjoy, thanks for the suggestion capital Q … Marianne
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Yes somehow I thought you might, Marianne. (Are Mary Annes part of the tribe, too?) Enjoy!
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Dunno 🙂
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To overcome CTS of the Soul, as you’ve described, I guess one needs nerve, as used in the JK Rowling quote, AKA chutzpah or balls. (We need a feminized version of this latter anatomically based term. 👧😊)
Thanks for link to relevant TED talks. The one on procrastination was especially appropriate for me!😓
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Yeah, a feminized one would be nice. Glad you got something out of the TED Talks, I love that place, get their weekly email with what’s new & hot on their site and always find something great.
Thanks for the visit and the note, hope you’re having a kindness-filled kinda day … Marianne
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[…] may help prevent Carpal Tunnel Syndrome of the Soul. Yeah, I made that phrase up and it’s just my theory but a good one if I may say so […]
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There is a wealth of things to think about in this post, Marianne, and to top it off, you linked to all those TED talks. Thanks!
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Well thank you Carolyn! I love love love TED Talks, can lose myself on that site for hours. Hope you enjoy the ones I included. Marianne
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